Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Is there?

Is there an end to this feelings of not knowing what is wrong?

Let me know so I could be optimistic again.

Dont leave me so I could be happy again.

Cus its been years.

Sunday, January 25, 2015

I wonder

I wonder how it feels to be happy,
I forget how it feels,
Someone help me feel it again.

I can laugh be happy,
But not happy throughout the day,
Someone help me with my day.

Wednesday, January 7, 2015


All I wish is to be happy cus 2014 is a shit loads of sadness. With my new study I mean my degree, I wish I'll find more new friends and maybe bestfriend or girlfriend. LOL

Who am I? Some handsome dude can just smack girl's butt and get the girl attached? LOLOLOL

I'm hoping that I could get greatest grades throughout my degree and also I'm gonna stop looking for one thing but instead to look for million things.

Such as friends to hangout. Also I would love to eat healthy and get some fat down. LOL

I WILL. InsyaAllah

P/S : I swear this is not a resolutions and shit, maybe it is.. IDONTKNOWSKLDNAKL

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Sleep sleep

Sleep sleep,
Sleep with your pains,
Sleep sleep,
Sleep your pains away,
Sleep sleep,
I sleep with my pains,
Sleep sleep,
Pains won't go away,
Sleep sleep,
To wake up with pain,
Sleep sleep,
To end tonight's pain.

Monday, December 29, 2014


It hurts to just feeling the hurts Im feeling. Youre hurting because youre in hurts.

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Thoughts were Gone

I'm on a family vacation, with all the problems I have I decided to think this vacation is a "time" for me to really rethink. everything. I thought this vacation worked perfectly well because my anxiety lessen and I can actually sleep.

Then one night, it hits me. I was bothered with the overthinking while I freaking sleep. I was asleep and then my brain just like hit me with these burdens that made me hardly to sleep well.

I then told myself. Getaways isnt the shit. I can never run away from it.

Monday, December 22, 2014

Time Machine everybody?

Deep in my heart I regretted knowing this one girl, we were in the point of telling each other's deepest problem to knowing each other. We were able to read our mind or maybe its just me and she didnt or she just didnt care bout mine. LOL?

Do you ever encounter a tweet cus I have that quoted; you will have/have this one friend who is now a stranger. Yeah, I got that feeling like seriously. Okay let me be honest...

I got attached and it was so awful I feel like I need a time machine and go back in time and just stay away from her. Plus, she has someone but still throughout that semester we knew each other its so hard for me to forgot. Theres also some 'rumors' that I kinda enjoyed but still rumors are rumors and Im sure as hell not gonna tell what the rumors are.

A month ago, I did think about her but then she popped up on my whatsapp. I was so relieved and kinda in joy cus hell yeah she remembered me! Apparently, she asked me about her fucking certificate that I need to do(I wasnt supposed to do the certificate for all crews on the CFOF event but got caught up with that. I hate that! SO MUCH) and I still didnt do it cus I wasnt up for it with all these shitty feelings like FOR GOD SAKE I dont even know which major I'm gonna pick next year!

Looking at her feed on my Facebook wall gives me this suicidal regret(not suicidal enough to do the suicide btw dont worry and this part isnt in this blog deal k jk not jk) and not wanting to even know her. Okay, its totally my fault for getting attached but still, all those regretting was all on me I wished I can just stay away from her. I think thats what you got for being this incapable of filling the physical need of women, you get attached easily.

My life sucks! YOURE WELCOME!